Have you found yourself hanging around on the sofa again, even though there is so much work to be done? Your heart is set on fulfilling your projects, wishes and dreams as well as your daily responsibilities, but one thing keeps getting in the way: Laziness.

It destroys every little plant of motivation with listlessness, tiredness and the feeling of wanting to distract yourself.

You may be reading this as you lie on the couch this evening and have not ticked off anything from your to-do list.It’s as if laziness has a stranglehold on you. It’s an almost impossible force to overcome. Once trapped, there seems to be no escape. It makes you feel completely exhausted in the evening, even though all you’ve done is lie in bed and maybe go to the toilet and the fridge a few times.

Why do we shun laziness like the devil shuns holy water, yet so many suffer from it? Who doesn’t know the horror that society has instilled in us? If you lose yourself in laziness, you will end up with a future that has no future. Life in the cold and desolate streets of the big cities, where no one is interested, is in store for people who ride the train of laziness. Lepers who seem unworthy of being part of society.

Ours is a society of doers. There is no place for those who do not do anything. We put doing before being. Aren’t doing and being of equal value? It seems not, because we have to justify our existence on this earth every day anew. Life feels like a daily struggle. And so we all seem to be caught in a hamster wheel of doing more and working harder.

But is this hamster wheel getting us anywhere? Is it wise to regard laziness as an enemy and to fight it so hard? Let’s start by looking at how the University of Cambridge defines laziness.

Definition “Laziness”:

the quality of being unwilling to work or make an effort

The definition of laziness focuses on the unwillingness to do anything. One does not want to get started and struggles with the task itself. This is somewhat different from procrastination, which we will also look at here. The Cambridge University definition of it is:

Definition “Procrastination”:

to keep delaying something that must be done, often because it is unpleasant or boring.

The difference is minimal, so the two terms are often used interchangeably. Procrastination is not about not wanting to do something, but about feeling unable to do it. It is a coping mechanism. But more on that later. Before that, for the sake of completeness and in order to paint a complete picture, another term should be introduced at this point, namely that of recovery:

Definition “Recovery”:

A period in which you relax, do not do anything active, or sleep.

Contrary to what has been drilled into us in life, these terms have very different meanings. The definitions give us the necessary clues to work out the actual meanings.

As mentioned at the beginning, the emphasis – especially in our Western culture – is on doing. We are expected from all sides to do, make and act. No matter how, the main thing is to do, make and act. And if possible, all day long. That’s why, in the morning, the trains and streets are filled with people who are proving to everyone else, day after day: “Look here. I, too, belong to the “Do, Make and Act” club.

But when we look at the faces, the question arises: how many of the often tired, worn out and absent faces like what they do, make and act on every day?

My guess: Few. Very few.

I can already hear many crying out and saying: “Yes, life is not a walk in the park. It’s not a fairy tale. Life is unfair. Shut up and get on with it!”

Children’s World

We are increasingly aware that “shut up and move on” is no longer an option for many people. Conditions such as burnout or chronic fatigue syndrome make it impossible for them to do so.

But not everyone suffers from such serious illnesses. In fact, a hidden laziness is creeping into the majority of people. What do I mean by this?

By hidden laziness, I mean functioning at a minimal level. It is a phenomenon where people do just enough to get by on the fringes of society. In a nutshell, a person with hidden laziness keeps up a facade.

But at an enormous cost. It takes a great deal of effort to maintain this facade of functioning and seeming normality. It’s common for such people to feel such exhaustion and inauthenticity that all they do is watch Netflix in the evening, browse through social media, have a glass of wine or drift off on the couch.

The moolee of laziness speaks to us, and warns us: “I don’t want to do this. I don’t feel like it. Don’t do it.”

But we feel so trapped in society’s conditioning that we are not hearing what the moolee “Miss Laziness” is telling us. Instead, we doubt ourselves and ask questions such as, “Why am I like this? Why can’t I be different? Why don’t I function properly?”

But the right question to ask would be, “How can I live my true being?”

“Insanity is the only sane reaction to an insane society.” ― Thomas Stephen Szasz

Haven’t you noticed that children are never lazy? They always have something to do and they love to do it. With every fibre of their being. We call it play, but the truth is that every child is living their authenticity.

By the time they are at school, at the latest, there is a creeping and gradual move away from their truth. What our friends, teachers and society think about us and the world becomes more important than what we want to show from within. Instead of following our paths, we choose the prefabricated, boring highways of life.

The search for our place in this world is determined by appearances. The inner self is increasingly denied.

This is understandable, because while in childhood our little quirks and character traits are seen by many as cute and just part of us, from school age onwards a uniform path is preferred. The principle of “carrot and stick” is applied, according to the formula “punish deviant behaviour, reward desired group behaviour”.

You can read more about the school system and education in another article of mine.

When it no longer works

More people are realising that they can’t do that anymore. That the prefabricated structures no longer fit a human existence. That we are becoming more and more confined and restricted. Laziness is a wonderful signal. It tells us: “Don’t do that”, “That’s not mine”.

Instead of doing what we feel like doing, we often remain in paralysis which makes it difficult for us to let go, which I think has two reasons.

• Forced recovery
• Punishment avoidance

What do I mean by this?

Forced recovery

After spending the whole day doing exactly what we did not want to do, we are mostly exhausted. Acting against our right path (which we all know deep down) is exhausting. In my opinion, there are few things more exhausting than going against your inner compass. So rest is a protective mechanism. If we were not aware of rest, we would collapse from exhaustion.

Laziness forces us to rest. In this way, the experience of listlessness has an important function.

Avoidance of punishment

But there is a second reason for paralysis. We have likely experienced what it is like to be punished for following our compass. This may be in the form of criticism from parents, ridicule from other children/classmates/friends, or simply disregard for our efforts. To avoid these negative experiences, we prefer to do nothing. Bringing the innermost out into the open is, of course, something that frightens us.

A way out of this dilemma

To find the way out of laziness, I think there is only one way: Surrender to laziness and listen to its spoken truth and stop suppressing it. Recognise this truth and admit it to yourself. Finally, begin to live the truth you have heard.

What this might look like in everyday life is described below:

Step by step

1. Complete rest

Allow yourself to rest wherever you are. Sink into laziness. Be with yourself. Let your mind wander. No matter how long it takes. It could be a month, it could be a year.

2. Build up energy reserves

Put less energy into the things our compass says we shouldn’t be doing. Try to reduce everything to the bare minimum. Do only what you want to do at work. Don’t feel rushed. Consider working part-time. Maybe look for another job or a part-time job.

3. Going through the procrastination phase

Procrastination is often used as a synonym for laziness. However, there is a subtle difference. Laziness reflects an unwillingness to do something. Procrastination focuses on the feeling of inability.

So with procrastination, we are already one step further, because procrastination implies that the task to be done is important and right for us. We just don’t feel able to do it. To establish if we don’t lie to ourselves and to find out if the task is an intrinsic motivation of ours, we can ask ourselves two questions:

• Do I need to do this unwanted task because it will enable me to achieve another goal or do another task that I feel like doing?
• Is it a great thing that I want to do, but at the same time I’m afraid of the reaction if I try?

Did you answer yes to any of these questions? If so, then you can be sure that you are on the right track and that you need to do this task. Procrastination indicates that we have experienced some form of rejection of our actions in the past. What we wanted to do was not recognised, punished or rejected.

We then developed coping strategies that took us away from what we wanted and needed to do. To overcome procrastination, we have to go through the very thing we are trying to avoid. The bad feelings and beliefs we have internalised so strongly.

There are several ways to overcome procrastination. Since there are several ways of doing it, I discuss them in detail in my article [[Procrastination: How to overcome it]] (Byron Katie et al).

I have also developed a tool to help you overcome procrastination using Notion.

CTA

4. Find your alignment

Like so many of you, I used to think that the road to success had to be arduous. A hustle, a scramble and a bustle among all those who are also struggling to succeed. That thought alone took away all my motivation. Until I came across Teal Swan at a workshop where she was talking about the biggest tip for success. Listen for yourself:

(I’ll link you to the post in the show notes).

Her tip opened my eyes and confirmed what I felt inside but didn’t want to believe. It’s not about competing with others, it’s about finding your true inner core that wants to show itself to the outside world. This core will always be unique because no one else will do what you do. This confirmation from Teal alone is so liberating that it has taken all the pressure off me.

On the subject: We are not all the same, I wrote another article which you can find here.

By doing exactly what I want to do and being full of projects I want to do, I already feel successful, even though I still have a full-time job and don’t make my living from this website.

Your journey starts now

I have struggled with laziness for many years and have often wanted to give up, thinking that it must be as much a part of me as earwax is to humans. Just as earwax serves an important purpose, so does the feeling of laziness.

But we struggle so much against laziness that we don’t even want to acknowledge the benefits we get from it. The great thing is that if we allow ourselves to be lazy and live into the day before we know it, we will have creative ideas that will lead us to new adventures we never thought possible before.

All it takes is a little bit of courage.

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